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Know your Push and Pull

One of the idiosyncrasies of ADHD is that it's a neurotype primed to respond.It thrives and excels on demand.It's been called a "gene for certain behaviours" that has evolved to respond in the moment (Thom Hartmann). In Hartmann's book, Hunter in a Farmer's World, he quotes physician Will Krynen, who, when researching indigenous hunting societies, saw - ".. the constellation of behaviours that we call ADHD… are highly adaptive.. [among people who are] constantly scanning th...

ADHD and negative self appraisal

One of the greater challenges for those of us with ADHD is that our brains amplify negative self-talk coupled with a propensity to experience emotional hyperarousal.These two key features of ADHD mean that we’re quick to judge and blame ourselves, and then get stuck in the painful feeling of that thinking. This experience is known as rumination - a persistent perspective and feeling of doom and gloom.Why are we prone to this? The ADHD brain is wired for interest, constantly drawn to thinking a...

Masking and ADHD

Certain behavioural norms are entrenched in society. Things like being still when someone speaks to you, looking directly at someone addressing you, being patient while waiting your turn, being polite, saying the right thing at the right time.While this is especially true for childhood, when we mature, the expectation of behaving the ‘right’ way can be even more demanding: not being overly emotional, having an aptitude at organising and prioritising your actions, completing things by due dat...

NZ Herald article on body-doubling

Co-working (or body-doubling) can be exceptionally anchoring for an ADHD person, particularly if they’re hyperactive. So that’s physically anchoring, but also anchoring in terms of attention.” I shared some thoughts with the NZ Herald recently about the productivity and focus benefits of body-doubling for people with ADHD... Click here to read the full article....

Routine: hate it and need it

ADHD: the “I’ll do it my way, when I want” can’t stand the concept of a routine, but then actually needs and is healthier with it.Routine is “scaffolding” for the dopamine deprived brain.It’s a healthy constraint that our wide open meandering mind needs to: Start stuff Complete stuff Feel in control Feel that things are manageable Get results and be proud of our work.And yet… the seduction of having a wide open space to do what we want is really compelling.But when we get that.. ...

Breaking the bias in neurodiversity

In March 2022 I featured in the Womanhood Journal for International Woman's Day, about my ADHD journey and what it can mean for all of us when we're ready to #BreakTheBias....

My ADHD Journey

It took me 49 years to receive a diagnosis of ADHD after which many of my own challenges suddenly made sense. Although I was brilliant at activating and motivating others, I felt a near paralysis when it came to doing what I needed to do for myself and my business unless it deeply interested me. I struggled with important but mundane tasks, not being able to apply a "just do it" ethos, and couldn't work out why. I was consistently inconsistent with things that I started unless these we...

The ADHD self-leadership pyramid

One of the best ways we can reliably thrive in the world with our ADHD is to take leadership (or ownership) of our own wellbeing. And it starts with self-prioritisation. Self-prioritisation is a dealmaker for us. While we hyperfocus on the next thing that catches our attention, or the most urgent task in front of us, our attention actually needs to be given to caring for ourselves and creating the conditions for us to thrive before we can be of value and service in the work that we do. This is p...

Getting out of the ADHD rut

One of the best things we can do for helping overcome chronic ADHD paralysis is getting a diagnosis. A diagnosis shifted my perception of the difficulty I had taking action, from one of self criticism and self loathing, to accepting that there is a good reason for my struggle. A reason based on the neurobiology of my brain. A diagnosis is one of the first critical steps we can take to changing the narrative about who we are.  When we realise we're not dealing with a character defect an...

RSD and the need to reframe your Value

Is RSD getting in the way of business development? RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria) is one of the most impairing parts of ADHD for 30% of adults with the condition.  RSD is part of the extreme emotional experiences that arise for people with ADHD. Having a deep emotional life and feeling intensely is common. The glass isn't half full for us, it's spilling over the top, just as much as the glass isn't just half full, it's completely empty. There's no halves with the ADHD mind.This ...

Having ADHD is a risky business, and it pays to take the risk to invest in yourself

This year I’ve invested more than I ever have in my business, and rather than a stressful parting of resources, it's been a surprising relief. A relief that I'm investing in talent and products that help me build the structures to succeed. Because one of the major insights since being diagnosed with ADHD is that a lot of what I once considered nice to have 'extras' are in fact crucial to my success. These include:An ADHD Coach and Mentor - to help me understand my ADHD brain, my challenges, my...

The paradox of "Ready"

When we are gifted with sensitivity and more susceptible to criticism, as well as dealing with a deficiency of dopamine, it is that much harder to do hard things.And we can easily be seduced into waiting for confidence or readiness. But it's not about being ready, or not confident enough... It’s about waiting to feel less fearful. Hoping to feel less fearful. We tell ourselves: I’m going to wait to feel more confident, then I’ll do it. Here's what is important to understand.. "CONFIDENCE i...